Sherspruce Johnpine

In support of Sherlock being spruced up by John pining for him.

108 notes

sherlock-is-straight asked: I've sent you a little puzzle, QSiT. Let's see if you can guess the correct answer: [erlockShay isnyay'tay aygay. yWhay areyay youyay ainwashingbray ildrenchay?]







Damn you, you know I can’t resist a puzzle. But the joke’s on you because this took a mere TWELVE HOURS to decode.

To answer your question: because I’m a sick person who gets off on power.

I ship it

#this pairing has epic hate-sex potential tbh

I hate you so much right now.

I ship it too. Does that make you… hate me? Is it thrilling in ways you can’t consciously acknowledge? Let me take your pulse, Gertrude. It could all be so simple.

#what would the ship name even be? #loudest subtext in sherlock is straight #that could work

Are you feeling delusional right now? Because I’m obviously the one who would top, my sweet fetus. I have a shitton of degrees and I’m 33 years older than you, and there’s no way that a woman of my status and maturity level would bottom for a baby child infant fetus like you. Your infantile gurgling will never convince my followers that I wouldn’t top no matter how hard you brainwash them.

I’ll be cumming back with more puzzles for you to decode soon, QSiT. Be on the lookout for them, and always remember to stand up straight and think heterosexual thoughts. I don’t want to have to put you in a timeout, but I will if you continue to speak to your grandmother in this inappropriate fashion.

I keep getting owned by people like this on the internet, I am getting a lawyer to save me from further embarrasment

Filed under this is beautify johnlock people